Top Ten Quotes: France and the French

Apparently I offended many people in my Jon Winokur interview by publishing this Vichyous attack on the French:

Question: Is there any hope for the French?

Answer: The French will always be the French. That’s both the bad news and the good news. What the British entertainer Ivor Novello said over 50 years ago is still true: “There’s something Vichy about the French.”

To make amends, I asked Jon to compile his top ten quotes about France. He couldn’t.

1. France is the most civilized country in the world and doesn’t care who knows it. John Gunther

2. France is a nation devoted to the false hypothesis on which it then builds marvelously logical structures. Gore Vidal

3. France has neither winter nor summer nor morals—apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country. Mark Twain

4. How can anyone govern a nation that has 240 different kinds of cheese? Charles de Gaulle

5. Dogs smoke in france. Ozzy Osbourne

6. We always have been, we are, and I hope that we always shall be, detested in France. Duke of Wellington

7. What I gained by being in France was learning to be better satisfied with my own country. Samuel Johnson

8. Everything is on such a clear financial basis in France. It is the simplest country to live in. No one makes things complicated by becoming your friend for any obscure reason. If you want people to like you, you have only to spend a little money. Ernest Hemingway

9. France is the only country where the money falls apart, and you can’t tear the toilet paper. Billy Wilder

10. They aren’t much at fighting wars anymore. Despite their reputation for fashion, their women have spindly legs. Their music is sappy. But they do know how to whip up a plate of grub. Mike Royko

11. The French probably invented the very notion of discretion. It’s not that they feel that what you don’t know won’t hurt you; they feel that what you don’t know won’t hurt them. To the French lying is simply talking. Fran Lebowitz

12. Every Frenchman wants to enjoy one or more privileges; that’s the way he shows his passion for equality. Charles de Gaulle

13. If the French were really intelligent, they’d speak English. Wilfrid Sheed

14. Germans with good food. Fran Lebowitz

Comments

[Solnyshok]

Well, I'm not French, but I did not find that funny either.

[IndianaYones]

I wouldn't worry too much Guy, after all the French never worry about offending everybody else with their disrespect for everything that isn't French.... ;-)

Just one personal experience I would like to share: have you ever noticed as a visitor, business or tourist, in France the complete lack of clear meaningfull signs? And don't try to ask the indigenous species because no matter how good you speak French, they refuse to understand you.... I thought it was me, but then I visited Spain and I don't speak a word Spanish but everybody was friendly and willing to help, they even pretended they understood me.... :-)

[hirschi]

Well Jon... Guy is a true marketing person. He saw the hits for his post + all the comments and realized: "Thats a great topic to get more attention for my blog and finally more backlinks". Thus I can increase my Technorati ranking and in the end reign over the (blog) world ;)
It's just polarizing people and this post is a good example for doing it the less intelligent way.

Someone from Germany...

[Jon]

Hi Guy, I am French and I am not offended by what you wrote but I can't for the life of me figure out what is the point of posting this "top 14"? What are you trying to achieve here or prove (???).

Clueless Frenchman,
Jon

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[hirschi]

14. [Edit] Germans with good food and bad cars ;)