Is Your Boss an Asshole?

Bob Sutton and the mavens at Electric Pulp have created the ARSE (Asshole Rating Self Exam) to help people to determine if they are assholes. This is an offshoot from Bob’s book, The No Asshole Rule: Building a Civilized Workplace and Surviving One That Isn’t, which I reviewed at the end of October.

I’m sure that none of you need to take this test, but you might know someone who does. :-)

On a related topic, Bob told me about a company called SuccessFactors. It makes performance and talent management software to automate performance reviews across global organizations and create visibility into performance data across the organization. This helps its customers determine how to find, promote, and pay people as well as how to manage succession planning.

The company is a no-asshole zone. It requires employees to agree to sign this document:

---

Rules of Engagement

1. I will be passionate—about SuccessFactors’ mission, about my work. I will love what we do for companies and employees everywhere.

2. I will demonstrate respect for the individual; I will be nice and listen to others, and respect myself. I will act with integrity and professionalism.

3. I will do what it takes to get the job done, no matter what it takes, but within legal and ethical boundaries.

4. I know that this is a company, not a charity. I will not waste money—I will question every cost.

5. I will present an exhaustive list of solutions to problems—and suggest actionable recommendations.

6. I will help my colleagues and recognize the team when we win. I will never leave them behind when we lose.

7. I will constantly improve Kaizen! I will approach every day as an opportunity to do a better job, admitting to and learning from my mistakes.

8. I will selflessly pursue customer success.

9. I will support the culture of meritocracy and pay for performance.

10. I will focus on results and winning—scoring points, not just gaining yardage.

11. I will be transparent. I will communicate clearly and be brutally honest, even when it’s difficult, because I trust my colleagues.

12. I will always be in sales and drive customer satisfaction.

13. I will have fun at work and approach my work with enthusiasm.

14. I will be a good person to work with—I will not be an asshole.

I agree to live these values. If my colleagues fail to live up to any of these rules, I will speak up and will help them correct; in turn, I will be open to constructive criticism from my colleagues should I fail to live by these values. I understand that my performance will be judged in part by how well I demonstrate these values in my daily work.

---

I hope you pass the ’hole-in-oscopy! If you don’t, be sure to get the book.

Question: How many bosses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Answer: One. He holds up the light bulb and expects the universe to revolve around him.

---

This is the distribution of ARSE scores of people who took the test. Clearly, most of my readers either aren’t assholes—or don’t believe they are assholes. However, there’s a niche (orifice?) to fill in asshole tests: Helping people determine if they work for an asshole.

At a basic level, this determination is very easy: Is your boss rude? Asshole bosses keep people waiting; they yell and scream at people; and they are demeaning. They think they can get away with this because, largely, they have gotten away with this since society tolerates bull shiitake from the rich and famous.

I digress, but I’ve often wondered which came first: Was the person always an asshole or did accomplishing something great (probably by luck) mean that people would tolerate bull-shiitake behavior? One thing is for sure: not all assholes do great things, so there’s no causal relationship. :-)

1. Thinks that the rules are different for him For example, a parking space for handicapped people is really for handicapped people plus him because his time is so valuable that he can’t walk fifty additional feet. Or, the carpool lane is for cars with multiple people, hybrids, and her because she’s late for a meeting.

2. Doesn’t understand the difference between a position making a person and a person making a position. The vice-president of acquisitions for a big media company is a big deal, but all her power, and therefore the ability to act like an asshole, evaporates without this title. Assholes usually don’t understand that their current position affords them temporary privileges.

3. Requires “handlers.” This means a personal assistant, appointments secretary/lover, public relations flunkie, and chauffeur. It’s funny but if an asshole didn’t have the position/money/status, he would probably be able to answer the phone, make appointments, talk to the press, and drive himself.

4. Requires the fulfillment of special requests in order to be happy/productive/efficient. For example, she needs a special brand of spring water from the south of France bottled by chanting monks when she’s making a speech. This type of actions represent flexing for the sake of flexing—not because any of this crap is necessary.

5. Relates to people primarily in terms of what they can do for him. In other words, “good” people can do a lot for him. “Lousy” people aren’t useful. The way a lousy person becomes a good person is by showing that he can help your boss in some way.

6. Judges people by her personal values, not the employees’ or society’s values. Assholes judge people according to only what they think is important. For example, a boss may value only professional accomplishments, so someone who is “merely” a mom or dad with a focus on a family is therefore inferior.

7. Judges employees’ results and his intentions. A boss never comes up short when he juxtaposes his intentions (“I intended to do your quarterly review”) versus an employee’s results (“You didn’t finish the software on time”). Instead, a boss should judge his results against his employees’ results and never mix results and intentions.

8. Asks you to do something that he wouldn’t do. This is a good, all-purpose test. Does your boss ask you to fly coach while she flies first class? Does she ask you to work weekends while he’s off at a hockey tournament? I’m all for using boss time effectively (for example, not making her drop off a package at Federal Express), but were it not that your boss could be doing something more valuable for the company, would she do what she’s asking you to do?

9. Calls employees at home or on the weekends. Rarely, as in once per year, this is okay, but any more often and your boss is certifiable. His happiness is not your problem 24 x 7. You are entitled to your personal time and space because slavery was abolished a long time ago in America.

10. Believes that the world is out to get her when faced with criticism or even omission. For example, bloggers don’t write about her because they are all jealous of her. Frankly, it’s more likely that he’s not worth writing about than the blogosphere is colluding against him. This boss needs to learn that “it’s no always about her.”

11. Slows down or halts your career progress. One can forgive or ignore the previous nine issues, but this one is by far the worst thing an asshole boss can do. Usually it’s a matter of convenience: “How can you leave me? I need you.” For doing this, a boss should go into the anals (sic) of asshole-dom. God didn’t put you on this earth to make your boss’s life better, so don’t hesitate to abandon a boss who holds you back.

You may be concerned that only you think your boss is an asshole. For this issue I offer the “Kawasaki Theory of Perfect Information About Assholes.” It goes like this: If you think your boss is an asshole, most likely everyone else does too. It’s seldom true that you think someone is an asshole, and everyone else thinks he’s great.

Comments

[JimboNC]

Six questions that define "Is Your Boss an Asshole" defines ordinary bosses. They aren't assholes as much as jerks. Probably less education than their staff, whom they resent having more.

Try three bosses who were criminals when all the facts were in: one was a blackmailer who proudly displayed his checks after setting his victoms up for his "treatment". A second was a child abuser who beat his adopted Downs daughter with his fists trying to make her smarter. And the third was a rapist. All three were friends who did bad things to their "underlings".

[Hdr]

I think that there are even a few more things that could be added to that list.

[Jean Naimard]

A boss who **needs** a bottle (of anything) from Southern France cannot be an asshole.

Assholes are those who won’t take **anything** from France by dismissing it as "froggy crap" and "unfreedomish".

*********************

Jean,

Have you seen this?

http://blog.guykawasaki.com/2006/10/top_ten_quotes_.html

Guy

[Jon]

Guy, who do you consider the bigger asshole? The asshole boss or the board of director that allows the asshole boss to remain in their position? Ahhh... the stories I could tell... remarkable how some companies even stay in business! It's because of bad bosses that I never regretted creating my own opportunities in life... no clue how people deal with this stuff on a daily basis.

Jon
Founder of myfoodcount.com - free & anonymous health monitoring

[shefaly]

The converse of your perfect-information theory is also true - if you think someone is great but all else think he is an arsehole, chances are they are right and you better change your opinion.. eh?

[TeesMyBody.com T-Shirts]

You just pinpointed every boss I've had since middle school.

[Brandy Galos]

I put this list right next to Seth Godin's "How to be Remarkable" list. That post generated a great amount of positive buzz.

It is amazing how many of the attributes that Seth is saying are good lined up exactly with the attributes that Guy is saying are bad.

For example:

Seth:
"Roger Bannister was remarkable. The next guy, the guy who broke Bannister's record wasn't. He was just faster ... but it doesn't
matter."
Guy:
"Assholes judge people according to only what they think is important"

Is all it takes to become an asshole just listening to bad advice?

Links:
http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/2007/01/how_to_be_remar.html
http://brandygalos.blogspot.com/2007/02/how-to-be-remarkable-is-your-boss.html

******************

Brandy,

It's hard to imagine that Seth and I would disagree on anything. Suppose Roger Bannister judged people solely by how fast they could run the mile. Then, for example, he'd judge Mother Theresa to be inconsequential.

My interpretation of this would be that Roger Bannister is an asshole if he thought this.

Guy

[Nox Dineen]

Great combination of humour and helpful commentary.

I'm pleased to have official proof now that although my boss is what might best be termed a lunatic genius he is definitely not an asshole.

[Dr. Todd Narson]

Guy,

My wife and I are partners in our own business....how do we answer this question?

**********

Todd,

I would believe your wife before I would believe you. :-)

Guy

[Marc Duchesne]

Dear Guy,

You write : "For example, she needs a special brand of spring water from the south of France bottled by chanting monks when she’s making a speech. This type of actions represent flexing for the sake of flexing—not because any of this crap is necessary."
May I ask you a question, please ? (well, this is the 'Comment' section, so I shouldn't ask :-) What do you mean by " any of this crap "? Is it the special brand, the spring water, the chanting monks, or the south of France ?

Sincerely Yours,
_Marc, from the North of France ;-)

*************

Marc,

Anything beyond tap water in a clean glass is evidence of an asshole.

Guy, from the North of Menlo Park

[Dennis Meyler]

Since I'm my own boss I'd say it's quite possible.

[Respect]

Is this business advice? Or the drippings of an unprofessional VC?

[Rick]

I guess I've got a pretty cool boss. I don't see any of those traits in her. Quite the opposite, in fact. And, she is free to call me on an evening or weekend. She doesn't take advantage of it, but does use it once or twice a year, usually in an emergency situation.

[John Lilly]

I've been following Bob's work for a long time & think he's terrific (and he's a great friend of mine). Glad you're posting about it and helping to develop this important meme.

But I find this post troubling in many ways. It's a form of populist discussion that creates divisions between classes (and creates the classes themselves) by giving an over-simplified message that's easy to agree with emotionally: "Isn't your boss an asshole??" "Hey, yeah!"

I have a tough time with the way you end, too: "You may be concerned that only you think your boss is an asshole. For this issue I offer the “Kawasaki Theory of Perfect Information About Assholes.” It goes like this: If you think your boss is an asshole, mostly likely everyone else does too. It’s seldom true that you think someone is an asshole, and everyone else thinks he’s great."

The reason that I have a tough time with it is that, mostly, I think that tension & strife in organizations comes from well-intentioned people trying to do things who don't understand each others' points-of-view and motivations. I think that there are a legitimate number of assholes in the world, and that responsible organizations should do everything they can to exterminate them from the organization and not let new ones in -- but even if you remove all the assholes, there will be misunderstandings and legitimate conflicts. And my feeling is that people should strive to understand each other -- assuming "asshole" because of position is, I think, a major problem, and probably a self-fulfilling prophecy.

[Jas]

I concur with bob that the best way for a boss to distance himself from being labeled as a AH is to distribute power among his group. The result of this is 2-Fold - first he gets in close contact with the people whom he works with to get a vibe of people's perception around him towards him secondly he's grows himself out of his position for the next level as more people would have clarity and understanding into his job and hence would be able to replace him.

To take it forward Guy we should have a forum called SOAK - Society of Ass kickers which are essentially beings which kick the AH's into shape. :-)

[Bob Sutton]

I would also add that #2 is especially critical, indeed, if that problem is conquered, the rest of the problems will go away. I also agree with Guy that the danger in explaining the problem -- as I try to do -- is it can also serve as an excuse for not tackling it because, after all, that is what happens to people in power!

[JAR]

Agree with BethC, there are few absolutes. The worst though is when they are aware of their behavior and choose to do it anyway. -Hello TJ Rodgers

Funny line kinda off subject... Al McGuire had a quote that went something like "A team usually can stand one ass, but not two because they'll breed."

[RBA]

To tell you the truth, Guy, I've never needed a test nor guidelines for me to know whether my boss was or wasn't an asshole. Someway, somehow I just knew :-)

[Beth C.]

>>“Kawasaki Theory of Perfect Information About Assholes.” It goes like this: If you think your boss is an asshole, mostly likely everyone else does too. It’s seldom true that you think someone is an asshole, and everyone else thinks he’s great.<<

So you would think. However when we look at exit interviews, we see that's often not the case. Some bosses are simply assholes to some and sweethearts to others.

Other times YOU are the asshole and so you think the boss is an asshole when she asks you to get your....ummmm...ass...back to work.

[Kilroy Was Here]

We had a guy who was a 20+ on the ARSE meter. He single-handedly created a toxic work environment which lingers a year after he left. In a start-up, there's nothing worse than a jerk who controls a major functional area. I'd rather have a great team and subpar market opportunity because a great team will change gears and re-focus on a better market opportunity.

[Bob Sutton]

Guy, thanks for this most interesting post. I would add that there is an interesting blend of Guy's and Brem's position. I agree that most assholes aren't inherently bad people. I'd even add that nearly all of us will act like temporary assholes under the wrong conditions -- when we are tired, under pressure, and so on, and especially when we are around assholes because, like other emotions, acting like a jerk is a contagious disease.

BUT the problem -- if you look closely at most of Guy's points -- is that there is a vicious cycle that can happen when people are put in positions of power. The effects of power are on people are very well documented. I talk about this in The No Asshole Rule and have written a number of posts on it. People who are given moire power than others tend to be less focused on other's needs and feelings and more focused on satisfying their own needs, and they feel more free to break social norms (Guy's point 1). And to the extent that there are bigger power differences between their underlings and themselves, these thoughts and behaviors get more pronounced. If you look at Guy's list -- behaviors most of us have seen -- you can see how a once perfectly reasonable person can go down this path. Because power blinds them to other's needs, feelings, and perspectives, they call people on Saturday, make special requests, and see people only as means to satisfy their own needs. And the more they do this, the more the power distance grows between them and their underlings -- and the worse they get!

The upshot of all this? Two things come to mind. First, if you are given a position of power, do everything you can to reduce unnecessary power difference between yourself and others (a good example is the new CEO of Home Depot -- he just got rid of the executive dining room; he also cut his own pay). Second, you need a group of close advisors and friends who can and will tell when you are acting like an asshole -- and even better -- assign your subordinates the responsibility to tell you when you are a jerk. If think this is impossible, check out the SuccessFactor's blog or my post about the guy there whose boss thanked him for being a jerk.

Guy, thanks for the post and let's keep talking and arguing.

[brem]

The problem with your article, Guy, is that most bosses don't fit the descriptions you provide us. Indeed, not everybody is a TRUE asshole. In my experience, bosses are usually just unaware, unexperienced, sometimes outgrown by the company's success, bad managers, incensitive to their employees needs, but they are not bad persons.

Well, most of them. :)

*********************

Brem,

I think that all that counts is the actual behavior, not the reasons why the behavior exists. To excuse asshole behavior for any reason perpetuates it. We need to draw a bright, hard line in the sand!

:-)

Guy

[Wendy Piersall :: eMom]

Thank you, thank you, thank you for #6. This is way more common than it should be - at least, it's common in the land of assholes. ;)